https://www.amazon.com/War-Art-Winning-Creative-Battle/dp/15...
If you're trying to spend more time creating things, I suggest you give The War of Art[1] by Steven Pressfield a read. It put words to a gnawing feeling I've felt since my late teenage years, but never knew how to confront.
[1]: https://www.amazon.com/War-Art-Winning-Creative-Battle/dp/15...