If you had been diagnosed, it may be worth giving it a try. You may be able to convince a doctor to give you a one-month supply of fast acting pills to evaluate the results, based on old diagnosis. This will give you more than enough baseline for much more detailed discussion and/or action clarity.
I don't have ADHD (or think I do not anyway), but my wife (late 30s) has been diagnosed as an adult and started taking Vyvanse six months ago.
This is fast acting, slow release, non-accumulative medecine. Her doze kicks in within 20 minutes and slowly tapers off over the day. There is probably some minor residual effect crossing into the second day, mostly because if she takes it for many days stright, she needs a day or two break.
Her taking Vyvance saved our marriage and she is feels that the person she was before taking Vyvance is "gone". The day she took the first doze, she wrote about 20 pages of notes of what was different. Off-pill, she could not write 20 pages on demand, online in full hyper-focus mode. The pill is less effective now, but it sure still makes a difference.
I think having "on pill" and "off pill" perspective on the same issue by the "same person"(you/her) can help break a lot of bad patterns where the person thinks their position is the only valid one. Suddenly, they get a range of options from the "inside of their head". It also allows her to still have access to traditional creative ADHD super-powers (off-pill days) but then balance it with productivity of on-pill days.
As an anecdote. Before the pill if we would walk up to a traffic light blinking green with 20 seconds left - she would refuse to cross. Just too worried about not having enough time. Probably not ADHD itself, but one of co-morbidities. But also maybe not having enough focus to make a snap decision. On pill, she will cross with 5 seconds left. Because she has the focus and the drive.
As another anecdote. Our arguments/negotations (pre-pill) would be like floating on a stormy sea, always changing direction and shape of the argument. And even if we reached a conclusion, it would only be about the very last point discussed, ignoring the journey. The first serious discussion "on the pill" felt not that dissimilar, but at the end she turned to me and said "So we discussed these 6 things (named 1, named 2, ...) and agreed on X". I was blown away, as I was very used to the old ways.
P.s. She also feels that Focus Factor non-prescription pills work partially (she discovered these pre-pill and still uses them on off-pill day). I am reserving an opinion and provide a link purely to clarify the brand, as the name alone gets lots of matches: https://www.focusfactor.com/products/focus-factor-original?v...
I don't have ADHD (or think I do not anyway), but my wife (late 30s) has been diagnosed as an adult and started taking Vyvanse six months ago.
This is fast acting, slow release, non-accumulative medecine. Her doze kicks in within 20 minutes and slowly tapers off over the day. There is probably some minor residual effect crossing into the second day, mostly because if she takes it for many days stright, she needs a day or two break.
Her taking Vyvance saved our marriage and she is feels that the person she was before taking Vyvance is "gone". The day she took the first doze, she wrote about 20 pages of notes of what was different. Off-pill, she could not write 20 pages on demand, online in full hyper-focus mode. The pill is less effective now, but it sure still makes a difference.
I think having "on pill" and "off pill" perspective on the same issue by the "same person"(you/her) can help break a lot of bad patterns where the person thinks their position is the only valid one. Suddenly, they get a range of options from the "inside of their head". It also allows her to still have access to traditional creative ADHD super-powers (off-pill days) but then balance it with productivity of on-pill days.
As an anecdote. Before the pill if we would walk up to a traffic light blinking green with 20 seconds left - she would refuse to cross. Just too worried about not having enough time. Probably not ADHD itself, but one of co-morbidities. But also maybe not having enough focus to make a snap decision. On pill, she will cross with 5 seconds left. Because she has the focus and the drive.
As another anecdote. Our arguments/negotations (pre-pill) would be like floating on a stormy sea, always changing direction and shape of the argument. And even if we reached a conclusion, it would only be about the very last point discussed, ignoring the journey. The first serious discussion "on the pill" felt not that dissimilar, but at the end she turned to me and said "So we discussed these 6 things (named 1, named 2, ...) and agreed on X". I was blown away, as I was very used to the old ways.
Books I found more helpful than others:
* Melissa Orlov's book about ADHD and marriage: https://archive.org/details/adhdeffectonmarr0000orlo * https://www.amazon.ca/ADHD-2-0-Essential-Strategies-Distract... - this one, among other good bits, includes a table of all ADHD medecines and their effects, including a comment that off-brand Concerta (I believe) does not actually work
P.s. She also feels that Focus Factor non-prescription pills work partially (she discovered these pre-pill and still uses them on off-pill day). I am reserving an opinion and provide a link purely to clarify the brand, as the name alone gets lots of matches: https://www.focusfactor.com/products/focus-factor-original?v...