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With respect to the chronic pain, I'd suggest some kind of embodied mindfulness practice to help alleviate the symptoms. I assume Western medicine has not been able to help you much on that front.

There are tons of techniques out there, some of which have been proven by scientists to help reduce the symptoms of chronic pain. I'd suggest you find someone qualified teacher, since doing some of these on your own might be dangerous.

If you are willing to go for something more out there, I'd recommend reading this book https://www.amazon.com/Meditation-Saved-My-Life-Tibetan/dp/1... (it's free on libgen). It's the story of a Tibetan monk which was tortured in a Chinese jail and developed gangrene in one of his ankles, which progressed to the point of almost killing him and destroyed his joint. Doctors kept pressuring to have his foot amputated, but he sensed it'd be the wrong choice. Eventually, he went into retreat in his apartment and practiced some techniques for healing he had been taught in Tibet. Within a year, his foot was mostly healed, and eventually his body somehow managed to grow a new ankle joint.

The book is not explicit about what he did, but the two main practices he alludes to are called "tsa lung" (moving energy through the body) and reciting the "Medicine Buddha" mantra. I think you'll need an instructor if you want to practice "Tsa Lung" (the monk in the book teaches it, but he moved to France). But Medicine Buddha mostly involves reciting mantras and should be safe.

I don't have a lot of personal experience with the Medicine Buddha mantra, but reciting another mantra ("om mani padme hum") and similar practices cured a chronic depression that lasted more than five years. Saying "cure" is a bit of an understatement, because my outlook on life has radically changed. My external circumstances have not changed a lot, but most of the internal turmoil has mostly subsided. So on the base of that, I am willing to consider the possibility that a monk might regrow a joint by reciting a mantra.

You don't have to believe in cosmic blue Buddhas (in fact, the official position is that they don't inherently exist, just like you and me). I think of these practices as a technology developed by a culture that put the mind at the front and center of their inquiry into the nature of reality.

Here's some references: - Medicine Buddha mantra (so you hear what it sounds like): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IoGmifZperY - A more involved practice: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=on7kiQawZJ0

This second one is a more traditional presentation, so it might not be your cup of tea. But I am including it anyway just so you can get an explanation from someone qualified. Again, sorry if this is too out there. But again, I doubt you posted here because you wanted to hear the same answers you get anywhere else.

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