I highly recommend the book to anyone who thinks they're an introvert, manages introverts, or has introverted family members -- it helped me understand/be happy with many of my own personality traits that I'd overlooked or misunderstood. (And, after reading the book, I realize I'm an ambivert, not an introvert.)
[1] https://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/...
https://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking-...
Extraverts on the other hand get energized by social interaction.
(Social interaction requires a lot of processing.)
Why ? It may be related to an organism's baseline of arousal.
The idea is that extraverts may have a lower baseline arousal rate, that they enjoy raising by interacting socially.
Introverts have a high baseline level of arousal, which gets raised too far by too much social interaction.
It is thought that extraverts are the majority making up 85% of the population, and introverts 15%.
This would explain why open office plans are the norm.
Ironically introverts often self select for work that requires deep focus, and end up having to do it in open plan offices designed by extraverts who see nothing wrong with that.
This is a good book on the topic: https://www.amazon.ca/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/d...
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain
https://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/...
It was a paradigm shifting book for me, made me understand some people in my life in profoundly new ways, and helped me discover stuff about my own personality. It's particularly interesting to think about introversion / extroversion in terms of managing energy levels.
1: https://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/...
It was a paradigm shifting book for me, made me understand some people in my life in profoundly new ways, and helped me discover stuff about my own personality. It's particularly interesting to think about introversion / extroversion in terms of managing energy levels.
1: https://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/...
An excellent book on Introverts is Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain
http://amzn.to/1Fxitw2 (affiliate link)
Assassin's Quest by Robin Hobb [1]. Stock fantasy at its best.
Rendezvous with Rama by Arthur C Clarke [2]. Been stuck at halfway for too long, it gets boring in places.
[0]: http://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/d...
[1]: http://www.amazon.com/Assassins-Quest-Farseer-Trilogy-Book/d...
[2]: http://www.amazon.com/Rendezvous-Rama-Arthur-C-Clarke-ebook/...
One common definition of extroversion vs introversion is that an introvert needs time alone to recharge, whereas an extrovert needs time around people to recharge.
I would suggest doing some reading on the topic to prevent undervaluing a large portion of the population. For example, see [2], or Susan Cain's "Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking" [3].
[0] http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/29/introvert-myths_n_3...
[1] http://psychcentral.com/library/shyness.htm
[2] http://www.bustle.com/articles/56526-7-things-all-introverts...
[3] http://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/d...
Aside from those I would suggest maybe reading Party of One [1] and/or Quiet [2], as they bring to light very well the fact that mainstream society unfairly and illogically looks down upon those who prefer aloneness. Being surrounded by laughing groups of sociable people has a way of making anyone not involved feel like they are missing out on something or that there is something wrong with them, when this might not be the case at all.
Props for such an honest post; and I hope you feel better soon.
[1] http://www.amazon.com/Party-One-The-Loners-Manifesto/dp/1569...
[2] http://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/d...
Introversion and extroversion have nothing to do with shyness or how outgoing you are. It has to do with where you derive energy and I disagree with the author of the linked article that introverts just need to practice social interaction. As the book points out, introversion and extroversion can be determined very early in life, she mentions a study where infants who were more reactive to stimulus turned out to be introverts and infants who were chill turned out to be extroverts:
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“The four-month-olds who thrashed their arms like punk rockers did so not because they were extroverts in the making, but because their little bodies reacted strongly—they were “high-reactive”—to new sights, sounds, and smells,” Cain writes. “The quiet infants were silent not because they were future introverts—just the opposite—but because they had nervous systems that were unmoved by novelty.” These “high-reactive” babies grow up to be children who need a lot of time to decompress after school, need time alone to be creative and explore. They are introverts, not anti-social, Cain explains. There is a big difference.
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Here's her TED talk from 2012 (19 min.):
http://www.ted.com/talks/susan_cain_the_power_of_introverts....
If you like that, you might enjoy her book on introverts:
http://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/d...
(non-affil link) http://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/d...
I always recommend to anyone to read the book "Quiet" (http://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/d...) to appreciate differences in personalities and learn how to communicate effectively with opposing personalities.
This post in particular puts me a little as ease, because I've largely felt that I'm one of the rare ones not in an extreme. Glad to know I'm not the only ambivert out there.
http://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/d... is an excellent book on the subject.
I also recommend writing down your ideas. When you lose your train of thought you can refer back to what is written down.
Ask for help - tell the group you've lost your train of thought and ask what was the last thing you said. People do not want to see you fail, they will help you.
Acknowledge it is okay if you don't sound confident. It's only important to communicate what you aimed to communicate. Focus on that rather than what you sound like.
If you organized the meeting or presentation, send an agenda or materials in advance. Look for feedback in advance. Send followups to your information sharing. Summaries and further info. All this can be done in chat/email.
I guarantee that if you do these few things you will feel better within a month.