It really sounds like your main problem is your depressed. So I'd get a therapist, get on medication, and try some things one the urls below.
And to expand on that, if you're not vibing or getting results from one therapist see another one. Don't give up after seeing just one. I know plenty of people that didn't see much improvement after one therapist but did well with others.
Look into medications, they are a lot easier to stick to than seeing a therapist especially if you're depressed. Even if the first drug doesn't work try another one. The non-response rates to a single medication are much smaller than if you didn't respond to one you try another one.
And to expand on that, if you're not vibing or getting results from one therapist see another one. Don't give up after seeing just one. I know plenty of people that didn't see much improvement after one therapist but did well with others.
Look into medications, they are a lot easier to stick to than seeing a therapist especially if you're depressed. Even if the first drug doesn't work try another one. The non-response rates to a single medication are much smaller than if you didn't respond to one you try another one.
In the process get started with this book. https://www.amazon.com/Cognitive-Behavioral-Workbook-Depress...
This website has a lot of useful information too. (Written by a psychiatrist) https://slatestarcodex.com/2014/06/16/things-that-sometimes-...