Found in 5 comments on Hacker News
mft_ · 2021-02-27 · Original thread
(No idea whether you'll read this, but...)

> I know you're trying to come at this from a "things could be worse" perspective

Nope, not really, I get that it matters, and how it matters.

I have two related points:

1) It matters, but it definitely doesn't matter to the magnitude that you think it does, right now - it's just one of many factors that matter. Yep, you've lost this one, so rely on your other good areas and if it helps your mindset, find some others to optimise instead. (Like, lose weight, or get ripped, get a better tan, etc.)

2) More importantly, though, your response to losing your hair is self-sabotaging: by taking it so badly, and so obviously losing confidence as a result, you're massively exacerbating the effect. Your response to your hair-loss is what is causing "...pretty much social suicide" - not the hair loss itself.

One day, I suspect you'll come through how you're currently feeling (with or without therapy?) and you'll probably have forgotten this exchange, but you'll see I'm right. But given the fickle nature of confidence, I totally get that you can't believe that right now.

PS read The Game [0] - not for the PUA nonsense, but for Neil Strauss' account of losing his hair, and how his mentality changed about it over time.


(Also, as an aside, I really like your concept of 'pretty privilege'. My GF is a lot more attractive, and also a lot more immediately engaging, than me; it's been enlightening to watch how different her experience of the world is, to mine.)


kamjam · 2013-06-21 · Original thread
This. Seems like a few lines taken out of context, and you can make anything seem bad if you take it out of context.

Sex - Pull out your cock and put her hand on it. Remember, she is letting you do this because you have established yourself as a LEADER. Don't ask for permission, GRAB HER HAND, and put it right on your dick. -

Sounds bad out of context sure, but in context he is talking about when you are about to have sex with the woman, in a private location (or whatever). You are in the act of it, not forcing yourself on a woman you just met in a bar.

Personally, I can see nothing wrong with this. Sure, the wording could possibly be better or less crass maybe, but if the book was to go to publish then there would be the time to go through that phase. All books go through edits.

Usual overreaction to everything that may seem slightly anti-feminist.

As josh2600 says above, there are similar books to this already, maybe we should start rallying Amazon et al too?

jseliger · 2011-08-18 · Original thread
This might sound odd, but try reading The Game by Neil Strauss: . It's superficially about how to pick up women, but a lot of it is actually about how to understand social life, what incentives operate on people, and what kinds of things most "normal" (for lack of a better word) people like. Don't use "negs," don't get too wrapped up in his questionable tales of sexual bravado, but do consider what he writes about how to understand the world.
fallentimes · 2008-09-30 · Original thread
If it doesn't help, at least you'll be entertained:

lallysingh · 2008-09-26 · Original thread
Seriously, bulk up, dress up, and use your geek-built analytical skills to do well in the social scene. Nice thing about high school is that nobody's really any good at that stuff yet, so climbing the curve is a matter of just getting out there & trying it. Everyone fucks it up constantly, so it's just a matter of hit rate. And getting some big knock downs is a plus here: tough skin later on's absolutely wonderful.

It's pretty liberating to pwn both worlds. B/c once you realize you're not limited to other people's pigeonholes (OPP), you look at the world differently.

For a good look on how not to do it, look up "The Game" By Neil Strauss.

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